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my whole wish was to prosper for our Savior and I
felt a desire to go and live with the Sist which lasted
till a cousin I had who went to live with the Bro.
soon left them again, and as I know he went with a
full intention to stay with them, it put such a damp
upon me, that I gave it up, thinking that I might per-
-haps do as he had done. My Parents spoke to me in a
very close manner, and told me never to think of going
if I thought of acting in the same way, but instead of
this proving a blessing, it hardened by heart, and I did
my best to stifle all convictions, I went on this wicked
way for near a Year, till I cou'd hold it out no longer, I
then made a full resolution to leave all to the consequence,
be as they wou'd. My Parents were exceedingly pleased
with this, and did to the utmost of their power to get
my things in readiness against my removal, which
took palce Oct 23 1761, when I mov'd into the Choir
House at Fulneck, my Mother accompanied me, but on
seeing her o concerned for fear of my not praying, affected
me very much, but I soon got to be at home amongst the
Sistr. tho' one thing always put a damp upon me, which
was that I was not sure of my Salvation. Jan 11th, 1762
I was receiv'd into the Cong. quite unexpectedly, but
instead of this being a pleasure, it was a paint o me, as I
honestly wish'd it not to take place till I knew for certain
that my sins were forgiven, now I had no more rest, think
I would neither eat nor sleep, till I had attained it, as at
time I thought it was all for my?, I went on in this way
for a whole Year unti Dec 18th, when Br. LaTrobe
preach'd a sermon, and took his text out of the Song
of Solomon, where our Sav. is describ'd as a Roe or a
Young Hart, he first treated of the swiftness of them
and likened them to the harts which our Savior makes
to any poor Soul in distress, whilst he was speaking I
felt so overcome that it is impossible to express what I
felt in those moments, when I was a little to myself,
having my Hymn book on my lap ,it came into my
mind to open a verse for myself, which was Jesus my
Bridegroom my soul is to Thee already joined and what
I fely at the reading of this is impossible to describe, it
was as if our Savior spoke every word of it Himself
and I had never heard the verse before, I was so happy,
and felt that such a change had taken place, that I cou'd
hardly believe what had happen'd to me, being me in
my Bliss, my Labouress (who? I believe had a mind to
try my faith and said, she had a question to ask me, adding
Our Savior will know if it is so, and the Sist shalt be
witnesses, the question was whether I had had our
Sav. forgiveness? I told her I know I had no duty? in
I know when the sun shone, but I know I must have
it daily renew'd, she answer'd me with those words, there
for without fresh suppllies - theformer dresses? and dis
Continually we're? need. By fish? on Him to food?. This
made one reason a little, why she should not? me fresh a
question but my fourth? failed not In the year 1760 I ??