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convinced of the great danger I was in, so that I became
very Heavy & much disstresst & seeing one and another
of my room companions received into the congregation
I was brought by such occasions to look afresh into
my own Heart & beg with the Tenderest Tears of my
dear saviour what He wou'd bless me & make help me to be more
open Hearted then Hitherto, for I now felt more than I was
able to bear, & I felt the Grace & confidence that He
wou'd look upon me His poor child --
March 27 1769 I was received into the congregation---
which was a great blessing & merited the Tenderest & most
Humble adoration my poor Heart was able to return' thus
fare or own words.
from This Time was Observed a particular work
of the Holy ghost. Her close & reserved disposition had
caused Her Laborers many uneasey hours as no
Traces of Thankfulness, cou'd be preceived Either for
Her liveing in the choirhouse or the care & nursing
bestowd upon or that she injoy'd ought pleasing
in the fellowship amongest the girls, she now became
more freindly & open Hearted & spok in a sinnerlike
& blessed manner over Her whole course & going
on, & that Her present Sickness was a real blessing
to Her, it being a slow wearing, which gave Her an
oppertunity of seeing several depart out of this Time
dureing Her abode in the sickroom which caused Her
many Tears, Especial one of Her room Girls namely
anna John Gambold, whose corpses she beg'd to have brought
to Her bedside before she was carried out, of the sickroom
Ah ^she cryd when will my Happy hour come, I used I cou'd not
bear the thought of dieing, but now all that Timidness?
is departed from me & I can Heartily wish My Saviour wou'd
take me to Himself, being one day observd weep in silence
?? and askd The occasion she answerd I was reflecting How
blind I shou'd be if my dr savr wou'd permitt me to be a candidate
but my weakly Tabernacle cannot be present at any such
oppertunity; but pray think of me, she was disired not
to make it Heavy to Herself but wait satisfied our dr savr
Time & love & long for Him with Her whole Heart;
On July 10 she was acquainted that our Savr had granted
Her request in being candidate for the Holy communion & also apathipaten?
she burn into aflood of Tears & Expressd much love and
Tenderness to Her dear savr for bestowing such Grace
upon so worthless a Creature as she was, & said I have
often spoke & Heard it spoke about the sinnership
but I never knew in all my Life what is was to feel
it in my Heart till I came upon my sickbed, indeed; its
quite a different thing to feel it then only to say I am a
sinner I will and shoud be a sinner, thanks be to my dr
Lamb who has given me the grace to feel thus Happy a
midn all poverty & weakness; & askd if she might
communicate this the knowledge of this favour she
had to be a candidate & a participant to Her sick companions who
Heartily rejoiced with Her, & waitd with impatience the
Happy moment of this great injoyment; & dureing the
Sacrament which she & another of Her sick companion
injoyd for the first Time, there was an inexpresable
feeling of the nearness of her unseen freind, whom Her
longing spirit wish soon for to Embrace, & she continued
in a Joyful Expectation of seeing Him face to face who
had thus Sacrementaly prepared Her for His arms & bosom
in the Midst of the Knowledge of Her own poverty and
wretchedness she as attain'd thro' grace in His merits
to close Her period in this Time during the blessing of
Her choir & Enterd into Her Eternal rest July 20 1769
& in the 14 year of Her age,